It’s been a busy past couple of days, and I suppose I’ve had some things on my mind — tho nothing that needs to be said here. However — it’s caused me to do a lot of self-reflection (as I’m so fond of doing) — and I figured it was time for me to stop and do one of those lovely self-evaluations (not testicular ones, you perv.)
But self-evaluation aside — I think there are some things I’ve realized recently that I’d like to write down simply for posterity’s sake.
1.) Wearing your heart on your sleeve isn’t always a bad things — but it isn’t always a good thing either. There are times when it’s good to be honest, and there are times when it’s good to keep quiet — and loving someone is knowing the difference between the two.
2.) Just because you see yourself one way does not mean that anyone else sees you in the same light. Some see you for the better, some see you for the worse. Examining your personal flaw with a magnifying glass is only going to make you self-conscious about things that others probably don’t care about. And if they do, well … find a way to sue them.
3.) Dreams can come true. And when they do, it’s ususally when you’ve pretty much outgown the dream or ceased to care. Funny how that happens.
4.) Growing up kind’a sux. Responsibility is for adults … and being a perpetual kid can make life very difficult. Managing money, holding a job, establishing a reputation, finding someone to love and be with, paying bills, dealing with scary issues like disease and death … this is what happens when you’re an adult. And yet, there is a sense of security and power in having wisdom and knowledge that I didn’t have 5 years ago that makes being an adult ok. Not to mention, knowing you have support of other “adults” in the same boat as you who love and care about you.
5.) Hearts are moldable. They can be shaped into anything you let it. But, as with glass sculptures, certain shapes can make a heart fragile and can easily break. But, a slow process … a lot of fire, heat, and observation can make that mold a stable and solid prize. However, no matter how solid and stable it may be — it’s still glass and can still be broken by poor judgement.
6.) Loving your friends is the only way to live. Care for them and they will care for you. Watch their cat when their on vacation. Make them dinner when they’re sick. Tell them you love them and how much they mean to you in a stupid card with a picture of a squirrel on it. Everything counts. Everything matters. Don’t think your feelings are unimportant or are disregarded.
7.) Look at your life — at the decisions you make. You’ll probably realize right away that you’re one dumb ass mother fucker. Look at your life, where you are. Realize that those dumb ass decisions made you who you are today. Look at your life — where you’re heading. Understand that more dumb mistakes are on the way, but that’s what life’s about. Learn from your mistakes. Don’t wash a red sock with your whites. Don’t leave a bottle of wine in the sun. Don’t ignore your gut feeling.
8.) Tell your Matt that you love him. And tell him until he drowns in it. But don’t just tell him — show him. Make it so he can say “hey, Michael loves me, you bitch.” Value him like nothing else, treasure your time together. We don’t have a lot of time — there’s always something else to be done. So make time for each other.
9.) Do not eat meat that has been sitting under a heating lamp for an given amount of time. Not only is it dry, but it probably has a host of bacteria thriving in its tissues. And trust me. You’ll only need repeat that mistake once.
10.) Treat yourself with respect. Pick yourself up when your down. Your mistakes aren’t always bad as they seem, unless it was you that mowed down that family of 5 the other day. Then yes, that was turrible. Learn to love yourself because you can do something better than someone else. Chances are, you can probably do several things better than someone else. And that someone else can do several things better than you. But — you’re still better than them.