It is now officially Christmas, and I have now wrapped most of my gifts. Oddly, I watched the original (black and white) Night of the Living Dead while I wrapped gifts. What a truly fantastic movie. It also made me realize how much the movie Cabin Fever is a bastard movie with way too many similar scenes (minus the gross fingering thing — that scene STILL makes me want to barf.)

Anyway, I hope you all have a very happy and safe Christmas. I hope you all setup your Caga Tio and have hit it with your sticks which sing the Caga Tio song. You think I’m joking or perhaps high? Google it and see what it is. I personally think all corporations in America should steer away from Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays and focus more on Caga Tio. Just think how much our economy would improve.

Just to quench your thirst for knowledge, here is a write up on Caga Tio from Boing Boing:

Caga tio comes in many sizes, but generally looks just like our new friend, sans the pipe. Customs surrounding caga tio differ, but all agree, caga tio means “shit log.” Here I relay to you what I think is the full blown caga tio ritual.

Fifteen days before Christmas, caga tio makes his appearance in the dining room, where he must be fed at least once every day. He likes oranges, crackers and sweet wine. In some families, caga tio starts small, but grows as the days progress toward Christmas.

At some point, caga tio is moved out of the dining room, into the living room, and covered with a blanket to keep him warm. On Christmas Eve, before the traditional Christmas dinner, the kids are sent to their rooms to say three Our Fathers, which gives the elders enough time to stash presents under caga tio’s blanket. After their prayers are done, the kids return to the living room and start beating the hell out of poor caga tio with big sticks. And they sing a song. One version goes “Shit, log, shit! If you don’t shit well, we will whack you again!” Another goes “Log, log, shit candy! If you don’t shit for Christmas, we will whack you once more!”

After the children have gotten their fill of flogging the log, the blanket is removed to determine caga tio’s state of digestion. Typically, a miracle has occurred, and the log has pooped wrapped gifts, which are called “the shits.” Often one of the shits will be something weird, like an egg, to let everyone know that it was the last one deposited by caga tio.

This is my understanding of caga tio, but I feel like there are probably many nuances I’m missing. If you know of any catalans, please let me know so I can ask them some questions.

Ah, another exemplar of Catalan Christmas coprophilia is candy shaped like poo. We got some of this stuff, but ate it all before we could take a picture of it. If you’re interested, we’ll hunt more down tomorrow. Acutally… it was GOOD – we’re getting more tomorrow no matter what!

And with that said, I wish you and your log the best for the the holiday season. I’ve got a lot brewing in my head which will have to be spilt here eventually — so until then, Merry Christmas!