MonthApril 2006

birds are dying!!

I understand that I’m not a kid anymore. Trust me, when David ganked a gray hair off my shirt today on our way to lunch, I understood the sadness that is age. /cry

However.

Watching young people today … I seriously don’t understand them. Maybe this what our parents thought all those (many) years ago when we were kids and teenagers — when they think “what the fuck are they doing?” When we make every issue into the biggest ordeal (shut up, David — I don’t still do that. Ass.) (Ok, at least not EVERY issue.) (Thanks.) I saw this little YouTube clip posted over at aprilwinchell.com — who is a goddess and is fit to be worshiped.

I mean, like, ya know, BIRDS ARE DYING!! What the hell is that. I mean … heaven forbid she look at the cancer death rate, or the AIDS ratio in Africa, or shit, maybe all the bombings in Iraq. But, I understand — birds are important too. Tho, I’m not sure how a bird dying is a sign of entropy of any kind…

Anyway, enjoy. 🙂

Blast from the Past

This weekend seems like it flew by, which is odd because I didn’t do jack shit. I did manage to do my dishes. And beat Kingdom Hearts 2. But funniest thing happened —

Saturday nite i was whoring around on the interwebs like I normally do and I got this random IM from someone I didn’t know who apparently knew me. He said his name was Wes — but I haven’t talked to anyone named Wes in years. And wouldn’t ya know — it was the same Wes from all those years ago.

Wes is one of my ex’s best friends. He was rather young when I was dating Ryan, but we totally clicked and would talk all the time. Bear in mind, he lives in Tennessee. But I’d talk to him about my relationship woes, and he’d talk to me of his woes. And over the year and few months Ryan and I were together, darling Wes and I became pretty good friends.

Well, once I sent Ryan back to Tennessee, I sorta disappeared from the Tennessee radar — including talking to Wes. I always felt bad about lose contact with him — and I’ve tried in the past to find him — but to no avail. He also tried to find me — and finally got my screen name from Ryan — and we chatted the nite away last nite.

I’ve missed him — I really have. And I’m glad I was able to find me again. I always enjoyed talking to him — and he always seemed to have a good objective view of things. So he sent me some pics of him and my how he’s grown up! I told him I was going to put a picture of him on here so he can be famous on the interwebs.

Anyway, I am going to go out and see him sometime soon — that’s the joy of working for an airline. I can just pop off whenever I want (for the most part).

So that was a great surprise to my weekend. It’s good to have you back again, Wes.

Fatty Fatty 2×4

I love social commentary. And I love panning people. But I HATE Patti LuPone. I mean, just her name is precocious. Can’t be Patty — has to be Patti with an i. Can’t be Lupone — has to be LuPone, because you know … Lu is a normal written article in so many languages. Maybe in the language Fat.

I used to like Fatty LuPone in her early days. Her recording of The Baker’s Wife is fantastic. Even her role of Fantine in Les Mis wasn’t bad. But it all went downhill from there — like one endlessly spiralling warble. Oh wait, no — my bad. That was just her live rendition of I Dreamed a Dream.

And then let’s not forget her outstanding role as Momma Corky in that one show … oh, what was it called — with the dog, and the Beatles song … Life Goes On?

Well, it went on just a little too long. No wonder that girl (the daughter girl) went on to do Lifetime movies… Speaking of which — has anyone seen that poor girl’s website: http://www.traceyneedham.com/. Wow, talk about a crime against humanity. Fan sites can just be creepy … I mean, who says this: THANK YOU TRACEY FOR BRINGING SOME MORE JOY INTO THIS WORLD !!!

It’s true. She’s the Christ-child. But I digress… there are bigger (and fatter) stars to discuss here.

Fatty did show some sparkle of hope in the DVD of Sweeny Todd, playing Mrs. Lovett. And now she’s on Broadway (now we know why it’s called the Great Wide Way) (ok, it’s not really. it’s the Great White Way, but i can’t make a joke out of that now, can i?)

So what has she ever done me wrong that causes me to be so painfully sour? She released a cd that was total shit that I bought that only had one good song in it, that was probably only amusing to me because it said “nipple clamps” in it. And now — now, she’s releasing yet another album with songs that are almost as old as she is.

I wish her the best of luck and that it goes over well so that she can retire and quit making awful cds.

heaven on their minds

I read an interesting article today on CNN about some lost biblical texts that have been found and carbon-dated and appear to be authentic. The text appears to be the lost gospel of Judas Iscariot, the apostle that betrayed Christ and now receives so much shit from all Christian denominations as being closely affiliated with Satan, being a son of perdition, etc.
I would be very interested in reading this gospel. Apparently it says that Jesus asked Judas to betray him — which, of course, is vastly different from what the other gospels preach. It really is a shame that politics and religion are so tightly intertwined that truth is obscured because of power-play.

I’ve always had an issue with the role of Judas in Christianity. I started asking questions when I was in high school that made me rather unpopular with the leadership of the local church. This was greatly spurned by the musical Jesus Christ Superstar which provides a look at the story of Christ through Judas’ eyes.

My point was that SOMEONE had to betray Christ. And sure, while Christ was applauded and highly recognized for his sacrifice, Judas also made a sacrifice and is now shat upon. The psychological torture this must have had on Judas … I mean, he eventually hung himself. And in Christian dogma, that act alone would prevent him from entering the Celestial Kingdom. But I don’t think his betrayl of Christ was as morose and foreboding as it was made out to be.
But then again, there are so many discrepencies in the Bible and in religion in general that I think it will be amazing if any of us end up in the Celestial Kingdom. Of course, most of us do our best by what we feel is right — which hopefully will hold some water when it comes time for Judgement — if there is a judgement.

Everyday a Little Death

I was thinking today about what’s going to happen when I die. It’s not something we really think about a lot. It reminds me a bit of when I was unemployed for so long and had an interview to be a salesman for a funeral home. It was cold-calling about buying coffins and shit. Who does that? Well, not me. I turned it down. I’d rather be unemployed than selling death.

But I digress … we never really stop and think about, much less tell our loved ones about the sort of stuff we want when we die. Of course, in the end, you’re dead – and you won’t give a flying rat’s ass either way. But still — I thought I’d take the opportunity to put in writing what I want to happen.

I don’t have a will — primarily cuz I ain’t got shit to put in the will. So, I hereby bequeath all my debt to the US government. After all, they have so much, I’m sure mine won’t even be noticed. I leave all my cooking stuff to my momma, my video games to my lil’ bro, Nathan, my computer stuff to David (and don’t look for pr0n on there, yo – there isn’t any — i’m not that kind of girl). I leave all my ikea furniture to whoever wants it, if it hasn’t fallen apart by then. Give my clothes to the poor, but throw away the ones with gross armpits, cuz that’s just nasty. You can all fight over my cds, tho it’s likely that none of you will want them — so donate them to local skating rink so generation upon generation can skate to Erasure as they should. You can give my car to Nathan as well, cuz presumably he’ll be old enough to drive by the time I kick it (knock on wood). I leave my kidney stone collection to the highest bidder on eBay, and the proceeds can go to pay off my medical bills to hospitals x, y, and z. Oh, my DVDs can go to whoever wants them. It consists largely of theater-related stuff, so if you like musicals, they’re yours.

Ok — so I don’t want to be buried. I think it’s gross. I want to cremated, but i don’t want to sit in an urn or anything. I can’t think of place to be sprinkled – so just sprinkle wherever you think is best. I like mountains, maybe Yellowstone?

No big funeral or anything like that. Some lovely music would be nice — perhaps Faure’s Pavane, Caccini’s Ave Maria (the Sumi Jo version). Some piano stuff — perhaps stuff by Yann Tiersann.

And I think that just about does it. I have all my life insurance stuff squared away — so there’s no issues there.

Morbid topic, i know. But, at least it’s writen down.

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